Beautiful Lives by Susan

Post-traumatic Stress Self-help Advocate

You are here: Home / Archives for Mind

Mind

Let It Go; What does that mean?

by

Let it go! What does that mean? It seems to be a catch-all for unanswerable questions that come up in therapeutic settings. It’s also a cop-out people use casually when they don’t want to address the issue at hand. I can’t count the number of times I’ve been told, “just let it go!” Ok! Poof! Magic! 🔮

Just let it go!

Let it go from Frozen

I’m so sorry. It doesn’t work that way. When we heal from PTSS, the process to ‘just let it go’ is a serious matter and it is not easy. It takes diligent effort through whatever tools are available to the victim to be able to finally ‘let it go’.

Live in the Solution

Once we realize that there is a solution to something that has plagued us our entire life, we are often in such bad shape that we could not possibly do this alone without assistance from techniques, books, or professionals. So, we then step forward and decide to seek out the tools necessary to help us move forward in our journey.

Jack Kornfield Quote

Some of the tools to accomplish this task are regular meditation, Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), toxins elimination from our diets, holistic health habits, and one of my favorites; we take care of ourselves first so that we can be of service to others who still suffer.

Getting Past Your Past, Francine Shapiro, PhD

A Great Visual

I use an amazing visual that has helped me tremendously when I participate in EMDR therapy. When I watch the side-to-side motion, I visualize that there is a super high-speed train off to my side that is running from the front of me to the back of me and it is filled with the sore emotions of a past experience.

These experiences are rushed past me and go back, back, back into the past and eventually dissipate back into the energy of the universe to be swallowed up and re-energized as a warm, beautiful, light that heals all it touches.

Old Past Memories
Old Past Memories

Although I’ve spelled out my thoughts in detail for you, please note that this visualization takes place in nanoseconds as I experience the back and forth motions in front of me. And, this is my personal version of ‘let it go’. It is immensely effective for me so I sincerely hope it helps you as well. I don’t forget anything that happened to me. But after use of this technique, the intense pain and harsh emotions around the event are gone.

Change the Memories

“Changing the memories that form the way we see ourselves also changes the way we view others. Therefore, our relationships, job performance, what we are willing to do or are able to resist, all move in a positive direction.”
― Francine Shapiro, Getting Past Your Past: Take Control of Your Life with Self-Help Techniques from EMDR Therapy

So, at least for someone with PTSS, I believe I’ve explained a bit of what it means to ‘let it go’. It enables me to erase the pain and move forward with a lighter step in my day and just a little bit more sunshine and happiness. I sincerely hope this helps you learn to let go of the pain and misery of your past.

Thank you for reading this blog. It means so much to me to share my thoughts, beliefs, and feelings with my readers. If anything I write about resonates with you, kindly contact me via Messenger.

Other Posts You Will Enjoy:

Anti-anxiety Cleanse to Release Inner Conflict

Color; How It Affects Our Lives

Turmeric; Reduce Stress and Increase Well-being

My Thoughts About Anti-depressants

by

I am against the over-prescribing of anti-depressants – not anti-depressants as a category. Over the years, I’ve come to the conclusion that the anti-depressant issue is no different than the ‘Valium’ or the ‘Opiate Pain Killers’. It’s all about profit.

About Anti-depressants and Big Pharma

I can speak about this because I was on anti-depressants for over 12 years. I constantly built up resistance to them, then it was taper down – taper up – change prescriptions and be miserable when you do. I felt like I was on an emotional roller-coaster for much of the time. Can you even imagine what physical, emotional, and spiritual damage this type of ill-fitting prescribed medication can do to a person? Yet most docs don’t even bat an eyelash when writing out these prescriptions all the while telling us they “are not addictive”. That’s a huge lie.

The Diagnosis

But, I was not diagnosed correctly until age 62 with Post-traumatic Stress Syndrome. When I was treated correctly, I realized that my compulsions were subsiding and along with it, anxiety and depression.

I still have issues, but I deal with them differently when I strive each day for balance. I don’t need anti-depressants. I’m not convinced I ever did. I needed treatment for what was actually happening to me. I don’t think I’m the only one who has experienced this scenario.

My case against anti-depressants.

Of course, some people do need them, but not to the extent they are currently being prescribed as a “cure-all.” When 1 in 4 women in this country is on mental health medications, I believe that smacks of mind or population control. That’s just not a pretty picture nor is it moral by any stretch of the imagination.

Why I Stopped

1. The thing most people don’t realize is that withdrawal from anti-depressants feels the same as withdrawal from heroin. It’s an ugly withdrawal, yet we’re told by our doctors that they’re not addictive. That’s a lie. Period. They tell you it has an “afterlife” and then vaguely explain what that means which was never really clear to me. However, I bought it hook, line, and sinker because I was in so much emotional pain.

2. When I became homeless after the recession hit and with no insurance, I could only afford one week’s worth of pills at a time and so was going through withdrawals every week until I could get my prescription filled. It was a horrible, roller coaster way to live when already living under such dire circumstances.

3. Fast forward a few years… Oregon Health Plan doesn’t allow mail-order prescriptions, so, during the heavy snow last winter, I was snowed in and couldn’t get to the store to get my prescriptions filled so I simply went through the withdrawals and stopped altogether. I don’t recommend this, for obvious reasons, but it’s what happened to me and it was both the end and a new beginning for me.

I Seek To Open Minds

It took me six months to feel half-way normal and now after over 1.5 years, I don’t feel the negative after effects and I’m over them. I have no intention of seeking out a new prescription.

I only seek to open minds. The severity of the implications of long-term use of anti-depressants must be discussed. I too resisted the information for a long time, but no more. I’m intent on exposing Big Pharma for the very dangerous entity that they are in this country.

In the past, we’ve allowed big pharma to successfully endanger multiple generations of humans on this planet with the use of Valium (highly addictive), then pushing anti-depressants (highly addictive), then they started pushing opiate-based pain medication (highly addictive).

Our rivers and streams are full of anti-depressants that get there through our sewer systems so that animals drink the water (humans drink the water out of our taps in our homes). The water transmits the anti-depressants to humans through animal meat as well as tap water. It is out of control.

I don’t claim to be a doctor. I am a survivor of decades of incorrect diagnosis by the medical community and their ‘recovery’ system that 97% of people who enter are not able to complete successfully.

It is my opinion, and I will not back down from it, that the pharmaceutical companies (who we ALL KNOW pay just as much for their votes in our government as the NRA, Insurance or the Banking industries) are the biggest criminals around. No, this is not irresponsible. This is my story. And, I will tell it.

Conclusion

It’s been my observation that too often people have revered doctors as demi-gods who have the final word when they are in fact humans who make mistakes. This is an inherent danger in prescribing medicine – you don’t know the limit of your Doctor’s knowledge. That’s why smart people get second or third opinions.

The final word should come from a patient who has made themselves informed of all the facts rather than the word of one person in their life. It’s each individual’s responsibility to sort through the information and come to their own conclusion.

People need facts and opinions to make up their own mind about how they want to proceed rather than blindly following doctors being wined and dined by pharmaceutical reps.

I made my decision after almost 15 years of trying to sort through it. It wasn’t made overnight. Ignorance is not bliss. But, it can destroy lives. That’s why I write.

Background on Banner Photo by Henri Pham on Unsplash

Other Posts You Will Enjoy!

What I do When Past Fears Overwhelm

Mother Earth does not need humans to survive

PTSS is Quietly Killing Firefighters

Anxiety Ruled My Life

by

Anxiety Was My Way of Life

To help relieve my anxiety, depression, and PTSS, I participated in Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) therapy about 2 years ago. Now, I look back and clearly see the anxiety I lived with on a daily basis throughout my life and therefore, how anxiety ruled my life. I remember early on, in my twenties, when I met new people for the first time, that I froze and didn’t know what to say or do. It was uncomfortable, but for all I knew, everyone experienced the same thing.

The Progression of Anxiety

Then, in my thirties, I started to notice that when I had to meet new people for the first time, I actually felt like I was weightless, and the ground underneath me was moving. It felt very similar to a small earthquake going off under my feet. Even though I moved forward, shook the hand and politely said what needed to be said, I was in a full blown anxiety attack.

Anxiety with Head Down

People have teased me throughout my life for walking with my head down. I always thought that I walked with my head down because I was afraid of tripping when in reality, I didn’t want to look at anyone or anything. I missed a lot. Because of the trauma I experienced, I lived in fear of those around me physically hurting me or worse, emotionally hurting me. This was anxiety in action.

How I Compensate

Even now that I am acutely aware of these behaviors within me, I still get nervous when speaking to a new mechanic or a hairdresser over the phone for the first time. If I don’t give it enough forethought, I experience anxiety, stumble over my words and appear, in my mind, very foolish. So, my life is one of pre-thinking and planning to avoid these very uncomfortable feelings of ‘less-than’, ‘fear of reprisal’, ‘appearing stupid’, etc.

When Anxiety Ruled My Life

Is there a resolution to my story? Yes. Some days are very good days but I have to stay balanced in everything that I do. If I don’t, the wonderful thing for me now is that I can see my unbalance and patiently take steps to re-balance myself.

I’m not a doctor nor a therapist. I derive my thoughts and feelings from my own experience, what I read, and the world that evolves in front of me. For this reason, it is very important for me to know what other people think and feel. If you identify with my experience or if you have comments or questions contact me via Messenger or the Contact form – both on this site.

Cover Image: Ivana Cajina

Other Posts You Will Enjoy:

All About Spirit Guides | Gigi Young

How I strive for balance

Feel Better Fast; 10 Easy Ways