Self-Talk Methods for Setting Boundaries
- Pay attention to what your body is telling you. When it feels like too much, it is. This is time for setting boundaries – kindly but firmly.
- Identify your boundaries. What drives you nuts? Make a list! Laugh if you want, but that’s a good place to start!
- Be aware of your doubts. They have a place, but don’t let them rule the day. Perhaps you don’t want to hurt somebody’s feelings but ask yourself…is that person being sensitive to your needs? Perhaps they simply don’t know what you needs are because you haven’t told them.
- Practice setting your boundaries with kindness. In fact, stand in front of a mirror and practice, practice, practice. Here are some examples that you can adapt for your own situation.
- “This is too overwhelming for me so I can’t be the person you vent to right now. Let me check back in with you tomorrow to see how you’re doing.”
- “I’m not ready to talk about this. I will let you know when I am.”
- “There is not enough time right now, but we can talk in an hour when my work is complete.”
- “I love spending time with you, but right now I need time for myself. Let’s make plans for later this weekend.”
- “You can borrow my dress, but I need it back by Sunday and please wash it first.”
- “I love hanging out with you, but I can’t always afford to go out to eat. Let’s have a picnic next time.”
- “I noticed a dent in my car after you borrowed it. Let’s talk about how you plan to fix it.”
- “You are standing too close to me, and I need you to take a step back.”
Tip o’ the Hat to Living Wild Arizona.